Captive audience indeed...

Im at the ticket counter, wondering which bus to take.

Decided to try Nice 2, being a fan of Nice, figured the additional RM7 was fair enough.
Theres also something romantic about double decker busses...cant put my finger on it yet tho...

Off i went...
Just when we were flyin over Penang Bridge, the 'in transit' entertainment system kicked in...

Kinna like a stewardess pre-flight address then giving details about...Nice+(NicePlus), not Nice 2!...

Not sure if it was by accident, but felt kinda crappy when it went "you are now aboard Nice+" then they showed the features of Nice+ with personal screens per seat, and 4 movie channel viewing choices and airplane like seats etc etc...suddenly Nice2 (granted was pretty comfy) suddenly felt like a budget bus express :(

Anyways, then the "in flight" movies kicked in...first up!... "They Nest!"...

Aside from being totally crappy and almost B grade, which bloody transit movie shows a thriller about cockroaches?!...but heck, it was something to watch anyways...and i DID purposely choose the seat right smack in front of the display unit...furk...no point regretting now...

Then, amazingly, the DVD pauses every 20 mins or so for an "Advertisement" break...first promoting itself "bla bla Transit Vision bla bla to a Captive Audience bla bla"...and then showing the same 5 or so adverts for hiring at ParkMay, a word about littering and some music CDs...over and over again...

And WOW!! no shit!...never has a phrase been so appropriately used...i mean shit...the movie WAS bad enough for me to consider jumpin off the bloody rig going at 100kmph down the North-South....bloody driver wouldnt open the door tho....Captive Audience indeed...

Then They Nest finally ended and we were in midpoint break...off for a ciggy break :) needed one.

Journey continued, movie 2 was....."Final Destination"...no complaints about that show...but not for a transit movie right??? I mean, it bloody starts off with a plane in transit blowing up!!! lols...the folks in the seats behind me were noticeably bothered...

All in all, the bus was impressive tho...top deck for passengers, a lower deck lounge to lepak with a central table...damn comfy...

Would reccoment it over Nice Express, but please...try to talk to the person choosing the movies before departure...

of sounds and syllables

We think in our primary language, no doubt about that. I was thinking recently on how such things would affect the different languages of thought and reflect on how we develop based on how we think.

I can barely think of any words that can be said in Bahasa Malaysia that has fewer syllables than its meaning in English or Chinese. Im not saying its not a beautiful language in itself, but what im looking at is efficiency...

Why would something like this matter? well, imagine a 100 lap run around the track of your school. At say, 200 meters a lap, that would add up to a 20KM run. Now say we add a pimple to the circular track, adding maybe 2 meters to a lap. 1% more aint that bad right? well, tell it to the guy that loses the run because he had to run an additional lap in total distance.

The number of syllables may not seem like much, but added up i think it would make a difference to the efficiency of how we input, document and process our thoughts and writings...

Take the way the chinese have developed their language...choosing to ignore multi-syllalble words. Is there a single syllable in spoken chinese that does not have one or more meanings to it? The way these are combined to for larger words are amazing as well, but i think the restriction may come down to documenting and decrypting written chinese, as some thought and context may need to be drawn for each character for the whole to make sense.

Im not saying everyone is affected by this syllable thingy, as i have met many, many intellectual folks who are obviously from a BM background, but on the overall, these are still a minority when compared with the general population here.

The chinese language on ther hand, is fairly interesting when viewed from a spoken point of view. I can see why math is their forte when it comes to comparing the chinese vs the other languages of thought on how we learn math.

The best example would be the multiplication table. The way we were thought in english was to pronounce every number and factor as well as the multiplication itself...

Remember "two times one equals two, two times two equals four" or "dua kali satu sama dua, dua kali dua sama empat"...

Again, syllable count comes into play, the chinese school of thought also used the multiplication table as a base, and the way they memorized it was far far more efficient...Taking this table as a primary table and not repeating unnecessaries like the multiplier function or "times" sped things up and made it so much smoother and easier to digest. I dont know how to type it out, but essentially, for anyone that has heard it, would recognize it like "2,1,2 - 2,2,4 - 2,3,6 - 2,4,8" and so on, and they coulod cover the entire table in a fraction of the time it takes the rest of us.

Its not that other languages could'nt do this, but we just didnt...but even if we did, syllable pronunciation factor again would give the chinese language an advantage here...

Upon hearing it being recited for me, i couldt but help think how smooth it sounded and not as draggy as the other methods used to teach us in our primary schoolyears. May not be a big deal now, since we are all familiar with our tables, but imagine the advantage of learning this way all the way back then...its a headstart for sure.

There are many other factors as well in determining the development of people from certain backgrounds, and im not saying anything above is 100% proof of advantages/disadvantages of a language, just what seems to me as plausible, so im praying noone takes any offense to anything said...and also apologies if i did offend anyone, its just one of those days that my brain decides to lau sai out things like this...

Just my RM0.02 for today...

Cheers,
-the ed-

Shit go shot! :(

I wanna go for stomp! :(

Everyone i know whos goin is goin on 24th nite, but i had to pull out cos of a friends weddin in KL, so im gonna go on the 23rd nite instead, but i dont wanna go alone!!! :(

This post is a last minute pathetic attemp to find out if anyone would so happen to be going on the 23rd nite show, and wouldnt mind a hopelessly lost soul - me! - taggin along with them!

AIEEEEEE!

-THE sEsat-

The infamous eagle joke

An nice joke i got a few years ago, but just learned that its used to see how you think :)

It goes:
There were a pair of climbers climbing roped together in the Scottish highlands. One of them, seeing a pair of eagles got overexited and slipped, sending both of them plunging to their deaths.

As their souls left their bodies and ascended into Heaven, they saw the eagles again, and one of them cried out "Ah! Eagles!"

But the eagles, being quite polite, said nothing.


:D
-e-

Chinkybonics

A list of things i learned from my mechanic, with some clues to what they mean

Drebshap
"Wah, ur car drebshap making noise..."

Aysorpar
"Your car vely vely bumpy leh kos ur aysorpar spring spoil dee"

Poyek
"That car where got wan poin six? That wan is a Proton Wahjia wan poyek"

Spagroo (my personal favourite)
"That vakoom hose cannot take out lar, they stick it with spagroo oredi!"


Could you get them all? more to come!
:D
-e-

Somebody kill me please!

I was feeling a little buzzed from the coffee i forced into my system halfway thru our meet. Lack of sleep calls for such crude remedies...

Didnt know how bad it was till i made the biggest foux pass possible in a meeting...

At 12.10 he mentions, u can go for lunch now and apologised for dragging it beyond 12.oo

In my blurness, i just blurted something about lunch being at 12.30-2.30...cos the schedule was changed yesterday...

Man, i feel really bad for nearly killing a windfall like that... Thank god he let us go anyways.

Still, the daggers in my neck from the glares around the room kinna hurt.

Manners? what are those?

People these days have no idea what etiquette and manners are about anymore

They seem to think that the only time to mind yourself is when people may know who you are...

It is NOT how you hold your cuttlery.
It is NOT how you open the door for a lady.
It is NOT talking politely to someone who doesnt deserve it.

IT IS however, a justification of how you were brought up, and how you consider yourself as a factor in affecting someone elses comfort or life.

Ever notice no-one cuts your line while lining up in the bank? or in a fast-food joint? is this manners at work? FUCK NO!

Whats happening at that McDonalds queue is that your fear of being recognized as a person with no moral upbringing is stopping you from just walking up front and asking rudely for a bloody Big-fucking-Mac and fries to go.

That same fellow suddenly becomes a self serving bastard the moment he goes behind the tint and glare of his car and will have no qualms about cutting into your lane after jumping most of the traffic holding you up.

Ask why they do what they do? "well, everyone else does it!"
Is that really justification? Does it make it right? i dont think so anyways...
Is mannerism doing whats right or doing whats convenient?

Well, someone once said, thinking is just rearranging your prefferences and prejudices...perhaps manners are also just made for convenience these days...guess i was wrong....

I know i may seem like a self-righteous prick when i say things like this, but at least im a self-righteous prick who knows his parents didnt miss out on Emphaty 101 classes while i was growing up.

I know they didnt mess up...............much :)

-just a small rant brought to you by the Ed

Tsuniama

Dont know about the rest of the world, but i keep getting this forwarded email about a tsunami warning this weekend...

The email plainly reads:
Afternoon gentlemen, Please avoid swimming this week-ends as I have been alerted that USA had detected some tremor underwater which potentially could cause a huge Tsunami that could affect Penang too. The risk is very high and is advicable not to go off-shore. Stay away from the beach. Thanks.
Those fishing hunters are encourage to plan for some other weeks .Thanks. Please convey this message to your friends and relatives before they are the victims of this disaster.

Aside from this, i was informed that a local chinese newspaper flashed a similar warning about a tsunami alert this weekend...

Doesnt tsunamis' need a trigger, and arent those triggers usually earthquakes and arent earthquakes usually rather unpredictable? Also, there have been no notices from local governments or any relevant parties warning us of such occurences.

If i had knew relatives or friends heading to the beach for the weekend to chill out and told them that there is chance of a tsunami, who would go? they would just end up wasting a really good weekend right?

Worse still...if i told my uncle who fished for a living...he would have wasted a perfectly good oportuinity to earn a living right???

This email is obviously made to tap into the recent fear of tsunamis instilled in Penangites by recent events... What annoys me more is that IF a tsunami were to hit in the near future, these idiots are gonna be jumping up thinking they were getting the truth via spam...

Come the fuck on ppl...grow up or get outta the gene pool...

For the seranis and those that just enjoy their crap

Survival Guide for Taking a Dump at Work

ESCAPEE: A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic/embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car & speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter at the urinal, pretend that you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with escapee): When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun's pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen do not panic, remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

COURTESY FLUSH: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

WALK OF SHAME: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk-up the shitter. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of a COURTESY FLUSH.

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER: A colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an Out of the Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER before entering the bathroom.

THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN): This is a group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPERS and identify SAFE HAVENS.

SAFE HAVEN: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

TURD BURGLAR: A pooper who does not realize that you're in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the TURD BURGLAR leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact. TURD BURGLARS have been know to cause premature pinchage, which inevitably causes you to pinch one off in the middle.

CAMO-COUGH: A phony cough which alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON or to alert potential TURD BURGLARS. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

ASTAIRE: This is a subtle toe-tap that is used to alert all potential TURD BURGLARS that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an ASTAIRE, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

WATERMELON: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a WATERMELON coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

HAVANA OMELET: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an escapee. Try using a CAMO-COUGH with an ASTAIRE.

UNCLE TED: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An UNCLE TED makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

FLY BY: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in, check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

enjoy!
-e- :P